Gods and Goblins

Im gonna go perform this in a bit. Kinda nervous, I feel rusty. 

This one is for anyone who has ever loved someone who has made the same mistake time and time again.

Last night, you stuck a needle in your arm as you begged for God.

You rocked back and fourth like you were a child in your Father’s arms.

As if you were crying out, “Daddy, Save me”

But the look in your eyes matched the daemons in your mind and they whispered

“just one more taste and maybe this time we’ll find that sacred place”

You used to be my NASA Cadet,

Launching out of this would.

Claiming, “there just isn’t enough space”

You once told me that you could eat a whole rose bush without feeling the thorns

But today you couldn’t even blow a wish from a dandelion.

So I, made a wish for you.

Our vertigo, mirrored green eyes, starred at each other with doubts.

8 years, with and without, but still, deep down, all I think about is you.

Not the you in front of me.

The you buried deep inside of me, with all that time and those memories of when we were kids.

When the sky was so fucking blue and perfect that it was disgusting

And when we would try to count to summer stars on those quiet nights.

We must of tried to count them a million damn times before we learned that

“hey kid, some things are just that impossible”

I wanna believe that getting you back is possible.

When we would steal bottles of wine and chit chat and watch the fire flies with all the kids we called friends even if we never saw half of them again.

When you protected me and I thought you were SO annoying.

When you told me boys were evil,

But I still continued to fall for them.

Well its your turn now,

I Wont let you fall again.

This morning when you woke,

You looked surprised.

But you survived.

And this could be a new day or another one full of self demise.

Just tell me that you wont keep closing your casket while you’re still alive.

The most healing thing you can do is reminding yourself everyday, that you are not alone.

That when you want help, I’ll always be home.

If everyday you fight one more day then I promise you will always have another day.